Thinking Gray

Who do you  want  to see make changes? We focus strongly on why we want them to change, and how they could be better… but what do we do to help them change? Obviously there are many ways we can both help and hinder them, and the one I will discuss here is whether we give them permission to change. …But if I WANT them to change, surely I’m giving them permission to? Not necessarily . Let’s talk about what change means: it means undoing ‘programming’ (for want of a better word) that has been developed and added to across your lifespan . That means some of the ideas and beliefs you hold may be years, or decades, old (read: very ingrained). Human ‘programming’ cannot just be forgotten or rewritten without significant trauma - and I can’t condone giving someone severe amnesia!  Changing habits, behaviours, or even beliefs takes a long time and the journey involves failures , sometimes really epic ones.  So, whomever you want to change will fail . Sometimes real

If you look back over old editions of Cosmopolitan, Woman’s Day, Dolly Magazine (‘90s teens unite!) you’ll notice they all feature articles with the latest hints, tips, and tricks to “ lose weight (and keep it off!) ”, “ love yourself ”, “ tone your butt/abs/thighs/arms ”, or “ live your best life! ”. If these quick fixes worked, surely these articles would now be redundant ? Well, they’re still out in force - especially since the internet has made “ 10 easy ways to be happy - and stay that way! ” free and accessible to everyone - so I’m going to go out on a limb and say that simply knowing hints, tips, and tricks isn’t the answer. When you want change, information isn’t enough. Whether your goal is about fitness, mental health, or even your career, it takes more than a few quick tips to change. Why is knowing not enough?  Well, we all know smoking causes lung cancer, but people still smoke. That’s one example of many I could call upon where we know something and don